Mark Predicts ‘Alias’: Season 5

I can’t believe we’re here, but the final 17 episodes of Alias are imminent, so! It’s time for PUBLIC EMBARRASSMENT AS ENTERTAINMENT, otherwise known as my attempt to predict what’s gonna happen next.

Before we jump into that, let’s tally my predictions for season 4:

  1. We will find out what is at the coordinates that Nadia gave Arvin. We actually did! Just much later than I expected. 
  2. They will both be disappointed in what they find. Wow, technically I’m right? Arvin discovered he’s TERRIBLE, and Nadia was disappointed that her father was so creepily obsessive. I AM COUNTING THIS. 
  3. We will find out what is on that secret file in the first episode. I tried. 
  4. My guess? Based on what Lauren said, Jack has actually been into all this Rambaldi stuff the whole time, and he had Sydney fed that hallucinogenic drug when she was a kid. I also tried here. This is not a bad prediction at all!!!!
  5. Vaughn and Sydney will try dating again in this season. HELP ME I WAS RIGHT AND YET SO FAR FROM THE TRUTH.
  6. Marshall will have survived Lauren’s attack. Yay!
  7. Sark will die this season, but not until the final 3 episodes. Oh, wow, I kinda forgot about him! I’m using this for season five.
  8. Irina will come back to the show! Y’all CACKLED at this, didn’t you?
  9. And then she’ll die by the end of the season, too. I am very glad she didn’t.
  10. We will not see Will again. RIGHT AGAIN. 
  11. Arvin Sloane will have a public fall from grace. oh my god i can’t believe it HOW COULD I BE SO WRONG. 
  12. Nadia Santos will join the CIA and be on the same team as Sydney. VICTORY. 
  13. We will discover by the end of the season that the prophecy regarding Sydney and Nadia isn’t real. More that it doesn’t matter, at least in the sense that people forced it to become real. 
  14. I DON’T KNOW WHAT ELSE COULD HAPPEN THIS SEASON. I suspect there’s an arc I do not see coming, and I am SCARED. Yeah, well, I wasn’t wrong about this! HELP.

Friends, let’s do this. Here’s my last round of predictions for season 5 of Alias.

  • Nadia is cured of her infection by the end of the first episode.
  • Vaughn will be in a coma until the end of the first episode.
  • We will find out Vaughn’s big secret at the end of the first episode.
  • And he’ll reveal that he was sent to spy on Sydney by the CIA to keep tabs on Sloane/Jack.
  • Vaughn and Sydney will get married by the end of the season.
  • Irina will re-appear by the halfway point of the season.
  • Katya Derevko will die.
  • So will Sark.
  • So will Irina.
  • Season 5 is going to deal mostly with the ramifications of Vaughn’s secret identity.
  • Arvin will NOT be head of APO anymore, but he will still work there.
  • Weiss and Nadia will also get married by the end of the season.
  • There will be a new threat as the arc of season 5.
  • Dixon and Director Chase will make their relationship public.
  • The season will actually end on a positive note.
  • HOWEVER, I’m guessing that Arvin’s attempt at redemption will FAIL.

Otherwise? This is all a mystery to me. So let’s go on this journey together!

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About Mark Oshiro

Perpetually unprepared since '09.
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