In the fifteenth episode of the second season of Veronica Mars, Veronica is tasked with finding a possible runaway bride, while Keith pursues a lead that might exonerate Terrence Cook. Intrigued? Then it’s time for Mark to watch Veronica Mars.
Well, I liked this episode! I don’t think it’s one of the stronger stories this season, but it was satisfying to watch.
- I think it could have been developed better, but I enjoyed a common theme throughout “The Quick and the Wed”: people are not quite what they seem, and appearances can be deceiving, whether that’s intentional or not.
- It’s fitting that this episode opens with Keith, heartbroken over Veronica’s revelation, pondering how it could at all be possible for Terrence to be innocent if what Veronica saw was real. And he has no reason to doubt his daughter! But he just worked so hard to prove Terrence’s innocence, and now this is what he’s got to answer to. So, being the dutiful PI, he turns the information over to Lamb, who is UNSURPRISINGLY RUDE ABOUT EVERYTHING EVER. I swear, if you tried to give Sheriff Lamb a puppy, I’m sure it would combust into flames because something that pure and good could not exist around pure evil.
- I don’t even care how ridiculous my opinions of Lamb have gotten, nor that I’ve completely fallen for his role as the antagonist cop in a noir thriller. Seriously, Lamb is perfect for this trope, and I kinda love Rob Thomas for refusing to subvert this particular archetype. IT WORKS SO WELL.
- If Lamb is pure evil, then Dick Casablancas is pure ignorant bliss. There is not an ounce of awareness in that man, is there? How can you sit next to Logan while watching that trashy gossip show about Logan and his family? Have you no shame?
- Actually, Vinnie has no shame. He’s set the bar for that. Bless you, Vinnie.
- But this set-up is important because the writers cut to the Denenberg’s home, and it becomes hard to deny how terrible Logan must look to people who don’t know him. Hannah has obviously seen his sweet side, and she believes that Logan has a capacity for kindness and grace that most people don’t ever get to see. At the same time, Cliff’s advice in the early part of this episode is vital to understanding the complex forces at work here. Despite that we know Logan (and have conflicting feelings about him), we have to consider that appearances, while deceiving, are all the rest of Neptune has. Logan willingly allows himself to be perceived as a smug rich white boy! It’s partially as a defense mechanism, but I also think he relies on it to get away with some of the shit he does. Some. I still don’t think there’s a chance in hell that he stabbed Felix, and Dr. Griffith’s agreement to drop his testimony is all the confirmation I need of that.
- But how is Logan supposed to prove his innocence without much effort beyond his moral certainty? Cliff knows that Logan is up against impossible odds, and Logan’s constant sarcasm isn’t going to win him over jurors.
- So I kept that in mind as I watched Logan proceed to deceive Hannah, Ms. Denenberg, and Dr. Griffith. I think he does generally enjoy Hannah and her dedication and kindness, but this might be the horrible thing he does that he brings to Veronica. Perhaps it was Cliff’s conversation that motivated Logan to take action in his own way, but regardless of what he was thinking, Logan put this shit in motion, and now Dr. Griffith is stopping his testimony. But what if the Fitzpatricks find out? How deeply intwined are they in this? And now Logan’s faced with a terrible conundrum: Did he just ensure his innocence and lose Hannah with the same act? Is that worth it?
- And if we’re going to talk about characters acting in opposition to their own appearances, apparently Terrence went to the same school as Logan for this. Y’all, Keith tries so hard to prove that the C4 explosives found in that garage were not Terrence’s. He even tracks down the car detail guy WHO USES THE VERY CABINET WHERE THE EXPLOSIVES WERE FOUND! Oh my god, it’s proof (circumstantial, at least) that the explosives couldn’t have been there during the bus crash!
- WHOMP WHOMP, TERRENCE GOT CAUGHT BREAKING IN THE DUMASS HOUSE AND HE WAS SHOT AND WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING TERRENCE. This case just gets worse and worse and WORSE AND WORSE. What was so important in that house? GAH, NONE OF THIS LOOKS GOOD.
- Meanwhile, the main story in “The Quick and the Wed” follows a case that Jane – Wallace’s…girlfriend? Girl he is dating? – brings to Veronica. After she doesn’t come home from her bachelorette scavenger hunt (THE LITERAL BEST IDEA EVER, OH MY GOD), Veronica sets out to find out what happened to her. The case seems fairly standard at first, which is the goddamn point because Vinnie. Look, I just appreciate Ken Marino a lot???? So yeah, I’m a huge fan of him showing up anywhere. And like Veronica says at this episode, as shameless as he is, he’s actually kind of good at his job! So the whole Spy vs. Spy vibe between them is just endlessly entertaining.
- As for the story itself, it’s decent. It was nice to see Wallace tagging along, though I wish he did more than that, considering that his girlfriend/partner was the one who initiated this.
- It’s also fun when a case is so confounding as this one. You never could have gotten me to guess the ending at all, especially since the whole thing looked like it was a weird combination between a kidnapping and cold feet. Instead, after figuring out that Heidi went off to see an ex-boyfriend, the whole case unravels at Veronica’s feet when she discovers she was wrong about all her hunches. Appearances were deceiving – and by design.
- I ADORE HOW THIS ENDS. The entire thing was set up by the Manns! The father hired Vinnie for a background check, and Paul continued Vinnie’s employment as a way to destroy Heidi by setting her up to fail. And that’s really what this was all about, right? Paul wanted a wife that was pure, and by that, he meant one without any history that wasn’t him. His behavior is so gross, and Veronica helps Heidi embarrass him at the altar. I LOVE IT. Because this whole message is anti-slut-shaming! As Heidi says, she’s done trying to prove her worth to him through being faithful and kind. What more can she do if he’s just going to assume the worst of her because she had sex with other men before him? (Seriously, what a childish, gross thing to ask of a person.) So she keeps the ring and pursues the life she wants. I LOVE IT.
- Of course, there’s one last plot I haven’t talked about: GROSS PEOPLE. Lots of them! Oh my god, Kendall, WHAT ARE YOU DOING. WHAT ARE YOU DOING. She is helping Aaron Echolls frame Duncan what are you fucking doing.
- Logan, why are you hitting on Kendall and confusing Dr. Griffith what are you doing?
- AARON ECHOLLS WHY ARE YOU ON MY SCREEN
- GO AWAY
- I DON’T CARE ABOUT YOU
- I HATE YOU
- YOU ARE SO GROSS.
- Also, Palo Alto is now a lost cause; it’s almost entirely a city exclusively for the rich and white, and it’s scary to look at how gentrification utterly changed that place.
- THE CASABLANCASES ARE WEIRD
- I HATE AARON ECHOLLS.
- That seems like a good place to end this review.
The video commission for “The Quick and the Wed” can be downloaded right here for $0.99.
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