In the fifty-fifth episode of Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood, I’m sorry, was there another part of this episode that wasn’t the full-blown love affair between Sig Curtis and Alex Armstrong? If you’re intrigued, then it’s time for Mark to watch FMA:B.
I’m going to be so ridiculous in this review. FAIR WARNING.
- Let’s talk about a few things in a serious way before I lose my shit and start talking about the two greatest ships this show has ever given me.
- Mustang doesn’t take long to return to his cocky self, does he? Dude, it’s okay, you showed emotion and weakness. It’s fine! We don’t need you to overcompensate. You’re perfectly fine.
- Have y’all ever noticed that there are a lot of dramatic closeups of eyes on this show? A lot of them! Like the one of Scar’s eye when Riza thanks him for showing Mustang compassion. Which… y’all. This show is too much. I appreciate that Riza acknowledges the precarious position she’s in, given that she participated in the genocide that wiped out most of Scar’s people. Scar is shocked by this display of gratitude, most likely because he’s not used to it at all.
- I’m just so glad that Izumi was in hiding the entire time. She needed to be a part of this, and IT’S SO WONDERFUL TO WATCH HER ON MY SCREEN.
- It’s so wonderful to watch Olivier. And Buccaneer. And Alex. And actual success.
- I touched on it in the previous review, but I’m loving that the weaknesses of those in Central are exposed to be the source of their downfall. They underestimated the rebels’ intelligence, their power, their creativity, and their organizing skills. In this episode, though, one particular general loses his life to his greed, which Oliver then avoids. He was so eager to ascend to the position of King that he didn’t see the Mannequins come into the room. Olivier, however, knows that this isn’t the time for her to seize power; it would make her the easiest target in the room.
- But before that scene happens, we have to talk about Sloth and Izumi and Sig. None of the people in that room know that repeated “deaths” of a Homunculus cause its Philosopher’s Stone to be drained of power, and yet, they don’t cease their attacks on Sloth. They can’t. Even worse, Alex and Olivier have a finite amount of energy. They can only take so much damage themselves. That’s why it’s so victorious when Izumi announces her arrival by transmuting a giant fist into Sloth. It comes at the exact point where Alex knows that he’ll never be able to live with himself if he abandons the battle, and, with a renewed sense of purpose, he steels himself for what might be his final attack.
- Instead, Izumi shows up, and she demonstrates that you don’t need military training to be a spectacular fighter. Nope, she’s just a housewife. I LOVE THAT SHE SAYS THIS SO MUCH.
- But y’all.
- Y’all.
- Sig Curtis
- Alex Armstrong.
- Sig Curtis + Alex Armstrong
- I don’t even feel like this is just some fandom ship. It’s as if the writers suddenly said, “Here you go. Here are those two muscle studs, they clearly love one another’s bodies, have fun with that.”
- I don’t ship this. I am dedicated to Sig/Alex for all of time.
- THEY SPARKLED AT ONE ANOTHER
- THEY MADE THEIR PECTORALS DANCE FOR ONE ANOTHER
- THEY FLEXED THEIR BICEPS FOR THEIR OWN AMUSEMENT.
- YOU CANNOT TAKE THIS SHIP AWAY FROM.
- BUT HERE’S THE BEST PART.
- I’m pretty sure that Izumi/Olivier is also perfect.
- Because Olivier thanks Izumi. WHO DOES OLIVIER THANK? NO ONE. EVER. Except clearly the person she is deeply in love with.
- I warned y’all that I was going to be ridiculous.
- So you know what I need? A fic where both of the Armstrong siblings realize they’re actually queer at the exact same time, and they end up marrying their respective Curtis soul mates. I don’t give a shit if this is the most cliched gay storyline in the history of fanfiction, it was made for these characters. I can’t get this out of my head, y’all. I can’t! How is this not canon? I don’t even feel like this is a stretch anymore. IT FEELS SO REAL.
- THIS LOVE IS FUCKING REAL, Y’ALL.
- I sincerely entertained the notion of making this review about nothing but Sig/Alex and Olivier/Izumi, but it’s too important otherwise. A lot happens here! One day, I’ll have the guts to be that ridiculous. On… my own site? Okay, NEXT TIME, I SWEAR.
- Oh my god, I love the explanation of the title of this episode. “The Adults’ Way of Life” refers to Olivier’s speech about inspiring the next generation of Amestrians THROUGH GOOD EXAMPLES. Which is so wonderful, y’all, but it’s also hilarious because I got the sense that Olivier was feeling a little competitive with the Elric brothers. Bless her heart.
- SO CAN I ASK A QUESTION THAT NO ONE CAN ANSWER BECAUSE SPOILERS? I don’t understand why Father couldn’t pull a Philosopher’s Stone out of Hohenheim? DID I MISS SOMETHING? WHAT IS DIFFERENT ABOUT HOHENHEIM? HOW IS HE MAKING IT DIFFICULT FOR FATHER? AND WHAT EXACTLY CONSTITUTES A “PERFECT” BEING? I DON’T GET IT.
- Yeah, don’t answering that. Just thinking out loud.
- I also had a realization that came to me once I’d finished the episode. I picked up on the fact that there was some random Central soldier walking behind Alphonse, Dr. Marcoh, Yoki, and Heinkel, but was confused as to why they were there when they weren’t part of the plot.
- HAHAHAH IT WAS BRADLEY, WASN’T IT?
- DAMN IT.
- I just… fuck. These people had like 60 seconds of joy. The rebels took control of CENTRAL COMMAND. A drastically smaller force took control of the biggest military base in the entire country, and they did so with the odds stacked entirely against them, and they did so in just a few hours. They deserved that moment of celebration because it’s just so impressive, you know? This should not have worked, but it did.
- AND THEN BRADLEY ANNOUNCES HIS RETURN
- WHICH MEANS HE IS NOW IN CHARGE
- WHICH MEANS THE SOLDIERS HAVE TO OBEY HIM
- GODDAMN IT!!!! IT’S AS IF EVERYTHING THE REBELS DID WAS UNDONE IN A MATTER OF SECONDS.
- FUCK FUCK FUCK
- How? How is this going to go down? How will Bradley explain his return? Will Mrs. Bradley find out about her son and husband? How could she not at this point?
- I’m so terrified of what the future holds. I made a comment early on in the video that a single day has been represented by a large number of episodes, and that’s simply incredible to me. It’s a bold storytelling choice, and it works. Still, the eclipse? It hasn’t even happened yet. There’s so much left that could happen, and I’m scared of what comes next.
- UGH.
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