In the seventh episode of the first season of Steven Universe, CONNIE! ONION! If that intrigues you, then it’s time for Mark to watch Steven Universe.
I HAVE A THEORY, FRIENDS. AND IT IS A THEORY ABOUT HOW STEVEN’S POWERS ARE ACTIVATED.
Let me back up first. I AM GLAD TO FINALLY MEET CONNIE, the brown girl from the opening credits. (Onion is there, too, but I’ll get to him in a bit.) But until the bubble showed up, I felt like “Bubble Buddies” was pretty standard fare. It’s the whole story about an anxious and shy guy wishing they could talk to the pretty girl. Of course, there’s a reason that the show opens with this trope and it’s not just to play it straightforward and unaddressed. The writers manage to avoid turning this into a “How To” session about how to properly interrupt someone while they’re reading. (Free tip: Don’t do it unless it’s an emergency, y’all.)
Instead, this doesn’t come off as a romance, but more as Steven’s attempt to become friends with someone who is super cool. Like Steven’s genuine acts in past episodes, this gloriously backfires right at the moment where he magically seals himself and Connie into an indestructible bubble. In a way, that’s a trope, too! It’s that whole thing when two people are trapped in a space together and there’s tons of awkward tension. Yet the cool thing about “Bubble Buddies” is how the show takes a scenario that’s probably familiar to a whole lot of older fans and makes it about something else.
See, Connie ends up being the more important character here. She’s the one we learn the most about, despite that it’s Steven’s mysterious magic that created the bubble. Connie is the one who inquires about Sadie’s relationship with Lars because she’s an outsider. Since she’s new in town, she knows less than Steven. You know, it wasn’t even until this episode that I considered that Sadie and Lars always worked together for a reason. Steven said they run Big Donut. So like… the whole thing? Are they way older than I thought they were? Okay, perhaps they’re like 16 or 17, and they’re like… managers? Something? Who actually owns Big Donut? WHY AM I ASKING ALL THESE LOGISTICAL QUESTIONS??? (This is what I do. Buckle up, friends.)
The duo’s interaction with Onion is also revealing, too. Before I get there: WHAT IS ONION. Human? Something else? Where did he come from? Why won’t he talk? Is this gonna be like Morn on Deep Space Nine, and I’ll just never see them talk? Anyway, note how Steven goes the long route in order to get Onion to fire the harpoon gun. Connie, however, knows there is a quicker method, and she writes backwards so that Onion can read it. Ah, so she’s quick on her feet! And clever! Plus, she’s first seen reading, and she gets through to Onion by writing. COINCIDENCE??? Okay, probably, but shush, I’m trying here.
So is Steven. Oh my god, he is so adorable, y’all, because he tries so hard. He is always so certain his ideas are great, even though they’re often quite terrible, but he approaches them with the same combination of reckless abandon and unfiltered joy. IT IS SO INFECTIOUS TO WATCH. The whole kiddie coaster idea makes absolutely no sense, Connie points it out, and he just keeps on going. I admire that kind of dedication. Of course, then things just get worse and worse and they get booted to the literal bottom of the ocean. And finally, someone in Beach City panics in response to their predicament. I’m guessing people are largely used to things being weird as hell, but Connie is, as far as we know, the “newest” citizen of the city. Has she seen anything strange? Given that she says her father moves around a lot for work, has he seen anything interesting in other places, or is it always confined to Beach City?
Anyway, more on that whole “panic” thing. When Connie (justifiably!) freaks out about being stuck at the bottom of the ocean in an indestructible bubble (WHAT A SENTENCE), she reveals a sobering truth: she has no friends. No, she has never had any friends. I bet that’s related to the fact that her father moves the family around so much. I say that because since I was 16, I’ve moved probably close to 50 times. It is not fun to lack stability, nor is it easy to build up a group of friends if you’re constantly moving, you know? So Connie’s fear of remaining friendless is exacerbated by the fear that she’s going to die. It’s only after Steven offers her his friendship – in the most heartwarming way ever, oh my god – that she’s able to calm down.
And that is when the bubble breaks. Steven’s magic seems to happen at moments of emotional duress or extreme joy. It can’t be happening randomly, can it? The bubble activated when he wanted to save Connie; it disappeared once he became friends with her. THAT CAN’T BE A COINCIDENCE.
By the way: where did that horrifying crystal worm come from? Why do they keep terrorizing Beach City?
The video for “Bubble Buddies” can be downloaded here for $0.99.
Mark Links Stuff
– I am now on Patreon! There are various levels of support, from $1 up to whatever you want! You’ll get to read a private blog, extra reviews, and other such rewards. I POST A LOT OF CUTE PHOTOS, OKAY. Think of it like a private Tumblr blog that only SPECIAL PEOPLE get to read.
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