Mark Predicts ‘The Next Generation’: Season 6

Oh god, these are so fun I AM SO GOOD AT THIS. Well, maybe not this time, but still, I think these are a riot. LET’S DO IT.

Let’s deal with season five before I get ridiculous about season six.

1. We’ll learn how that Romulan leader looks like Tasha Yar. We do!
2. I don’t think Worf is leaving permanently. He’ll rejoin the crew by the second episode. First episode! 
3. The House of Duras threat will also be dealt with in the premiere. It was!!!
4. But it will extend to a second episode later in the season. IT WAS NOT. Ah, I had a good run. 
5. The bulk of this season will deal with the Romulan threat. Well… not at all, actually. There was maybe one other Romulan episode? But that one – “The Next Phase” – was barely about the Romulans.
6. We’ll get another Data-centric episode. Technically? 
7. As well as one surrounding Riker. Not really? 
8. And one surrounding Guinan!!! It’s about time for her to have one. AHHHH THE FINALE IS A GLIMPSE OF A POSSIBLE GUINAN BACKSTORY. PLEASE GIVE IT TO ME. 
9. Q will appear once. Yay!
10. So will the Ferengi. HELL YES. 
11. So will the Cardassians. No luck, but I’m carrying this over to season 6. 
12. We’ll get one time travel episode. The finale!!!
13. We’ll also get an update on Wesley. AND EVERYTHING IS FUCKED UP. 
14. NOW Dr. Crusher and Picard will go on a date. (COME ON, MAKE IT HAPPEN.) Instead, Picard will get married and have two kids and ruin my fucking heart.
15. The season 5 finale will crush my soul. You know what? It didn’t. I liked it a lot and it was a ton of fun, but I’m not crushed. Y E T. 

And thus, let me possibly embarrass myself with predictions for season 6:

1. We will find out why Guinan told Picard to go with the away team.
2. Data won’t actually die in 1893, but we’ll get an explanation for his severed head.
3. There will be at least one two-parter in season six, and if it’s the finale, that counts, too. BECAUSE I SAID SO.
4. We will not see Lwaxana Troi this season.
5. But we will see Q once.
6. We will also see the Cardassians again.
7. We will see Wesley Crusher once near the end of the season and it’ll be in an episode where he finally graduates from the Academy.
8. We’ll see Sela again.
9. We’ll get a Holodeck episode.
10. We’ll see Ro Laren four times.
11. There will be an episode about the Romulan threat. Just one!
12. I think I will like season six more than season 5.
13. Riker will have sex with another species at least once. I mean, this is a given, no?
14. We’ll see Alexander twice.
15. There will be an episode that sets up Deep Space Nine at some point!

Off I go to head into my final two seasons of this show!

Mark Links Stuff

– I am now on Patreon!!! MANY SURPRISES ARE IN STORE FOR YOU IF YOU SUPPORT ME.
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