In the thirteenth episode of the second season of Farscape, THIS SHOW IS SO WILD, Y’ALL. Intrigued? Then it’s time for Mark to watch Farscape.Â
Oh god, I waited WEEKS for this resolution, and IT DELIVERED. IÂ do have a few nitpicking comments to make, as I found that “The Maltese Crichton” was a bit choppy at times, but holy shit, this was ultimately pretty damn great! Let’s break this up by the three main plots.
Moya and Zhaan
While I appreciate the emotional connection made here, I gotta call foul on the resolution of the previous episode’s dilemma. Moya and Pilot’s “death” was probably something that was impossible to keep as a permanent plot twist, and I think I would have been upset forever if that had been the case. Still, I’m not the biggest fan of the whole, “It was all a test! Gotcha!” plot twist. It feels like such a simple solution to what’s been a rather draining story. That being said? I also don’t want to take away the scene where Moya speaks to Zhaan and asks her to sing. THAT IS SO BEAUTIFUL. And I also loved that we got yet another glimpse at Zhaan’s anger! This time, Zhaan is KILLING A GOD. Okay, maybe Kahaynu isn’t a god per se, but still. THAT SCENE IS SCARY.
I am thankful that Moya and Pilot are all right, and I’m hoping that like Aeryn and Pilot’s connection, we’ll get some moments between Moya and Zhaan because of this episode. I just wish I felt better about how we got to this point. It’s not the worst thing ever, but it wasn’t very fulfilling to watch.
Aeryn
I feel a very similar thing when I think about Aeryn’s development in this episode. What we get at the end of “The Maltese Crichton”? Oh god, it’s so worth the journey here. But I felt like some portions of Aeryn’s rock-climbing adventure with Dregon are clumsy and forced. I understood why she was paired with him, and the same goes for Crichton’s scenes with Jena. However, I don’t know that I find them all that believable, you know?
I suppose that’s the point with Aeryn’s plot here, though. After her frustrations in the last episode, she chose to run off with Dregon to avoid dealing with her emotional turmoil over Crichton. She exchanged her discomfort for… well, another kind of discomfort, if we’re being honest with ourselves. She’s not the least bit compatible with Dregon in any sense, and that includes the physical one, since he is nothing more than a constant thorn in her side here. In a sense, Dregon serves to remind Aeryn that she’s fleeing from her problems because she’s so unused to dealing with them. That’s not really anything new for Farscape, though, since that had been established long before this episode. So I was once more left unsatisfied with the journey. I didn’t find it too compelling to watch Dregon and Aeryn interact, and it’s all neatly wrapped up by the unexplained appearance of some random dude. Which, by the way, happens like twenty minutes after Dregon states that no one ever comes to this place. Except this random dude? He goes to this place.
But IÂ love where this takes the story. There’s a brilliance in the decision to film that final scene without any dialogue. I suppose it’s possible to read it in two different ways, one that confirms Aeryn or Crichton’s compatibility or doesn’t. Personally, I read it as a lovely affirmation. Aeryn spent this entire episode refusing to cope with her emotions, and I thought that her use of the test was a way for her to face them head on. This would allow her to confirm wether or not it was worth it for her to pursue Crichton further. Why else would she smile or Crichton would smirk? I think this was a way to help Aeryn make an important decision regarding her relationship with John, BUT I GUESS I WILL HAVE TO SEE.
The Maltese Crichton
Oh, there’s just so much here that I love, y’all. I mean, we open this episode with a plot twist that makes Crichton’s predicament A BILLION TIMES MORE COMPLICATED. And I was already concerned about how the mess created in the previous two parts would ever be resolved! But lo and behold, Cargn has decided to behead Crichton’s statue and throw it into a pool of acid. HAHAHA WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHOW. With yet another wrench thrown into the lives of literally everyone here, the writers are able to explore a number of unlikely and wacky scenarios just because they can. And while I did find “The Maltese Crichton” to be erratic at times, that did lend to its charm for me.
It’s complicated! I’M COMPLICATED.
I utterly did not believe a second of the Jena/Crichton romance, first of all. That felt like it came out of nowhere, and unlike Aeryn’s interactions with Dregon, I never got the sense that it was part of a larger story. Jena finds out that Crichton has been lying about his whole life, asks him if she can trust him, and then they’re having sex in a lake? That escalated so quickly, y’all! I was equally perplexed by Cargn in this episode, who follows his dastardly antagonist deeds perfectly until he kills Prince Clavor… thereby destroying his very plan that he’d spent two episodes trying to carry out. Like… does he just decide the Scarran alliance doesn’t matter anymore? Is his need for personal revenge suddenly way more important than his entire race? I WAS VERY CONFUSED BY THIS, Y’ALL. It’s not like I felt beholden to caring about Clavor at all because he was absolutely awful and whiny. But didn’t he need Clavor to finish his whole plot? Right? AM I MISSING SOMETHING HERE?
I don’t these things distracted me from enjoying this, however. Beheaded Crichton! D’Argo being forced into the most awkward alliance ever with Scorpius! Scorpius insisting that D’Argo doesn’t understand the power of the Crichton/Scorpius ship! (He totally ships himself with Crichton. IT’S CANON NOW, OKAY.) AND THE HUGE REVEAL ABOUT THOSE TUBES IN SCORPIUS’S HEAD, HOLY SHIT, WHERE THE FUCK DID THAT COME FROM. I wasn’t ready! I WASN’T READY FOR THIS.
The thing is, resolutions for a story as complex as this one are tricky. I probably sound a lot more critical than positive about this episode, but it’s only because I’ve spent so much time detailing my feelings about certain writing choices. But Farscape delivers on the emotional front for practically every character interaction in “The Maltese Crichton,” and for me, that’s why I ended up enjoying this so much. (Oh my god, y’all, I keep typing “The Maltese Falcon.” IT’S A STRUGGLE.) This story might have a convoluted journey at times, but so much greatness emerges at the end. Moya and Zhaan bond; Aeryn comes to understand her emotional state better than before; Chiana and D’Argo speak openly about D’Argo’s lost child and are utterly adorable with one another.
And Crichton falls right into the role of the sacrificial hero, choosing to leave Princess Katralla and his unborn child behind so that Tyno can assume his role in his place. (Though I do have to side-eye that line about children needing two parents or a father. Yeah, no.) Like, I wasn’t even ready for Crichton talking to his daughter through that simulation? I WAS NOT FUCKING PREPARED FOR IT. And that’s the tragedy here, because only Crichton loses. The Empire will stand, Katralla and Tyno will get to be with the one they love, Cargn is dead, and Scorpius is… wait, dude, WHY DIDN’T YOU KILL SCORPIUS? Oh my god, you have made a huge mistake. Perhaps Crichton ships himself with Scorpius and can’t bear to end his arch nemesis! YES, THIS IS A SENSIBLE THING TO CONCLUDE, MARK.
Regardless, I still think that this whole trilogy of episodes is an immense moment for Farscape. In hindsight, this shit was ridiculous in the best way possible. The storytelling was all over the place, the writers took unreal risks with their characters, and AN EXPLOSION OF FEELINGS. Bravo, Farscape. That was a treat.
The video for “The Maltese Crichton” can be downloaded here for $0.99.
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