In\u00c2\u00a0The Voyage Home<\/i>, the crew of the\u00c2\u00a0Enterprise<\/i> begins their journey home to face the ramifications of their actions, only to discover a threat to Earth along the way. Intrigued? Then it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s time for Mark to watch\u00c2\u00a0Star Trek<\/i>.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
What the fuck did I just watch?<\/p>\n
This is perhaps the most surprising thing I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve come across in the\u00c2\u00a0Star Trek<\/i> canon, namely because it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s clear the people running the show knew they had an audience already. This movie is a bunch of people saying FUCK IT and giving this fandom the weirdest and funniest entry into its canon, and I just\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 I adore how fucking terrible it is at times? I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t even know if I have any criticisms to offer to you because I want to wrap this precious movie up in a blanket and hide it from the world. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s too good for us. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s too hopeful. IT\u00e2\u20ac\u2122S TOO LOVELY.<\/p>\n
It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s only now, thinking back on it, how much this film breaks from EVERYTHING expected of a\u00c2\u00a0Star Trek<\/i> film, and yet it perfectly fits within this fictional universe. There\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s not a single antagonist within the two hours of\u00c2\u00a0The Voyage Home<\/i>. That probe is an unthinking, unfeeling thing, sent to check up on Earth\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s progress. THROUGH HUMPBACK WHALES, which is both the worst and\u00c2\u00a0most perfect<\/i> thing in the universe. Like, if you sit there and think about it, it makes no sense. Whales? Whatever alien race visited earth picked WHALES to use as a check-up device? But then you sit there and think about it, and holy shit, they picked the most peaceful and docile species to keep track of, and any society that destroyed the innocent was probably terrible. However, I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t view this probe as a villain, and I think doing so kind of ruins the whimsical chaos of this film.<\/p>\n
AND CHRIST. I was not ready for a\u00c2\u00a0funny<\/i> film, and I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m so thrilled that no one spoiled this for me. The reveal that whales were technically the impetus for the probe? It was weird, but it felt like it was\u00c2\u00a0Star Trek<\/i> weird. I could buy it, no problem. And I never got to a point where I felt like this wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t something that should belong within this universe. If anything, by the end of this movie, I wondered why the show hadn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t toyed with more humorous scripts. The comic timing of these actors, particularly when they work together, is unreal. But it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s not just the timing. Sure, it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s a lot of fun to see Spock try to understand the world all over again, or to watch Chekov take himself so seriously.<\/p>\n
For me, though, the joy of this movie comes from watching these characters \u00e2\u20ac\u201c who have faced ungodly horrors in the universe, who have watched their friends and crewmates die at the hands of unnamed alien creatures, who have seen places and things most humans have not \u00e2\u20ac\u201c struggle to spend FIVE MINUTES IN SAN FRANCISCO without dying. It is so beautiful that I hesitate to even bother to describe the multitude of reasons why I have needed this. I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t want to sully this. But that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s why this is so funny: their own species is far more mystifying to them than any alien. In that sense, they all become like Spock, struggling to understand why it is that a bus needs exact change. They don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t get why yelling very loudly about \u00e2\u20ac\u0153nuclear vessels\u00e2\u20ac\u009d in front of a cop is a terrible idea. THEY DON\u00e2\u20ac\u2122T UNDERSTAND THE ABSURDITY OF HIDING IN GOLDEN GATE PARK OR MIND-MELDING WITH A GODDAMN WHALE OR HOW TO USE 20TH CENTURY COMPUTERS AND\u00c2\u00a0IT IS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL RUNNING GAG I COULD EVER ASK FOR<\/i>. Y\u00e2\u20ac\u2122all, Bones believes our late-80s medical equipment is on par with the\u00c2\u00a0Inquisition<\/i>.<\/p>\n
How could I not love this movie?<\/p>\n
It was refreshing to have a film focus on\u00c2\u00a0all<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0of these characters, to give them meaningful scenes (sometimes on their own!), and to show us that this franchise is willing to do weird shit to entertain us. At no point during this film \u00e2\u20ac\u201c as odd as it was \u00e2\u20ac\u201c was I ever bored. Not once. I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t even care to nitpick the bad science or the time travel paradoxes because\u00c2\u00a0it doesn<\/i>\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t matter to me<\/i>. Hell, the handwaving of these things is part of the movie\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s charm! Did Scotty and Bones accidentally change time by giving up the formula for transparent aluminum? Will those whalers alter the timeline? How can any space vehicle get that close to the sun? WHO GIVES A FUCK WHEN THE FILM IS THIS ENTERTAINING?<\/p>\n
Spock\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s journey is rewarding to watch. The movie doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t ignore that he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s still reassembling his memory, and I was fascinated by his willingness to adapt out of a need to save the future of the human race. Dr. Taylor\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s journey was also surprising! I didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t expect this script to stick to bringing her into the future; most time travel stories don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t do this, but she gleefully comes along, eager to help out, and I adore that about her. (Oh my god, that means both of the parents from 7th Heaven<\/i> were on this show now. WILD.) She\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s not just a pawn here; she gets her own story, and that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s something Star Trek<\/i> isn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t always that good at. Plus, she doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t end up as a romantic subplot for Kirk, even if there might be some underlying attraction there.<\/p>\n
I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t even know what else to say, y\u00e2\u20ac\u2122all. This was so much fun, and I can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t hate on any of this. Like\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 WHAT WAS THIS EXPERIENCE LIKE IF YOU SAW IT IN REAL TIME? Did you know it was about whales in space??? DID OTHER FANS APPRECIATE THE BEAUTY OF THIS WACKY ADVENTURE? I never want to stop talking about this film, please indulge me, y\u00e2\u20ac\u2122all. At least until I start\u00c2\u00a0The Next Generation<\/i>, WHICH IS NEXT. IT\u00e2\u20ac\u2122S HERE IT\u00e2\u20ac\u2122S HERE IT\u00e2\u20ac\u2122S HERE!!!!<\/p>\n
The video for\u00c2\u00a0The Voyage Home<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0can be downloaded here for $2.99<\/a>.<\/p>\n Mod note about\u00c2\u00a0The Next Generation<\/em>:<\/strong>\u00c2\u00a0Please be aware that while most places combine\u00c2\u00a0both parts of the show’s pilot into one episode, Mark is watching them separately.\u00c2\u00a0The split has been listed in the schedule for about two weeks, so hopefully this isn’t coming as too much of a surprise, but if you missed it, here’s where the split\u00c2\u00a0happens: Part 1\u00c2\u00a0ends at 48:29 after the line: “Vs jr’er tbvat gb or qnzarq, yrg’f or qnzarq sbe jung jr ernyyl ner.”<\/p>\n Mark Links Stuff<\/b><\/p>\n – Mark Does Stuff is now on Facebook<\/a>! Feel free to Like the page, which I’m running myself, for updates and SILLINESS. In\u00c2\u00a0The Voyage Home, the crew of the\u00c2\u00a0Enterprise begins their journey home to face the ramifications of their actions, only to discover a threat to Earth along the way. Intrigued? Then it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s time for Mark to watch\u00c2\u00a0Star Trek.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[628,614],"tags":[615,631],"class_list":["post-4438","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-original-series-films","category-star-trek","tag-mark-watches-star-trek","tag-the-voyage-home"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4438","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4438"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4438\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4438"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4438"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4438"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
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