In the nineteenth episode of the fourth season of\u00c2\u00a0Deep Space Nine<\/i>, this is one of the most fucked up episodes of\u00c2\u00a0Star Trek\u00c2\u00a0<\/i>ever. Intrigued? Then it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s time for Mark to watch\u00c2\u00a0Star Trek<\/i>.<\/p>\n
Trigger Warning: For extensive talk of mental illness, incarceration, consent, nonconsensual medical procedures, PTSD, trauma, torture, unreality\/gaslighting.<\/b><\/p>\n
Good fucking god. I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t even really know what to say about this episode. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s a shocker, obviously, both in terms of how far the writers take this idea\u00c2\u00a0and<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0in their decision not to magically cure O\u00e2\u20ac\u2122Brien in the final moments. And you know, I guess I should start there, despite that it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s the end of the episode. Even though\u00c2\u00a0Deep Space Nine<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0has been more than willing to toy with expectations, I still went into this believing that by the end of \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Hard Time,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the writers would determine a method to cure O\u00e2\u20ac\u2122Brien of what the Argrathi did to him.<\/p>\n
Except they don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t, and it makes this whole episode sting so much more than I was ready for. To say this is an upsetting story is the understatement of the century. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s so disturbing because it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s not a metaphorical representation for something that happens in the real world; it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s extremely literal. Yes, the impetus by which O\u00e2\u20ac\u2122Brien experiences trauma is fictional, but at no point do the writers devise a way to suggest that what happened to him wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t real. It doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t matter if it was an implant; O\u00e2\u20ac\u2122Brien\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s PTSD is a real thing, his hallucinations are a real experience, and his guilt and shame over what he did in an imagined reality still\u00c2\u00a0matters<\/i>.<\/p>\n
That\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s what makes this episode such a real and satisfying thing for me. I suppose it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s strange to say that watching someone\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s suffering is satisfying, but it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s not because I enjoy that by itself. (This show really seems to torment O\u00e2\u20ac\u2122Brien, doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t it?) There\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s a validation achieved through \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Hard Time\u00e2\u20ac\u009d because this story is so respectful of the fact that for many people, there\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s no \u00e2\u20ac\u0153cure\u00e2\u20ac\u009d to their PTSD or the trauma they went through. Maybe if I could actually do therapy, I might get closer to getting better, but the truth is that I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve lived with PTSD for most of my life. There\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s no easy solution for me, and thus, it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s easy for me to relate to an episode that tells me that\u00c2\u00a0this is okay<\/i>.<\/p>\n
Because while O\u00e2\u20ac\u2122Brien has a difficult time assimilating back into life on\u00c2\u00a0DS9<\/i>, at no point does this show say it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s impossible. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s challenging, and that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s an important thing to acknowledge, too. O\u00e2\u20ac\u2122Brien picked up habits from his \u00e2\u20ac\u0153time\u00e2\u20ac\u009d in prison that are going to be hard to break. (If he chooses to break them, of course.) He\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s lost trust in other people, not because they did anything to hurt him, but because that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s been his default state for\u00c2\u00a0twenty years<\/i>. That is often a very difficult thing to explain to people! I get why folks might be offended or hurt when interacting with me and I feel the need to pull away or set boundaries that make interactions complicated. Hell, it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s something I still cope with in my relationship, since I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m thorny about a whole host of issues surrounding the trauma I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve been through. Asking someone to deal with your own trauma is a scary thing to do because\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 well, it didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t happen to them. Trauma is so isolating and personal that once you add anyone else to the equation, there\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s always that threat of pushing them away looming over every interaction.<\/p>\n
That\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s what I saw throughout this episode. O\u00e2\u20ac\u2122Brien\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s guilt over killing Ee\u00e2\u20ac\u2122char consumed him, so much so that he devalued himself. His outbreaks aren\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t him just lashing out at a frustrating, scary situation; they\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re acts of self-sabotage. He truly believes that he does not deserve the friendship that Julian offers him. The same goes for Jadzia and Sisko and Quark, and\u00c2\u00a0especially<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0for his own family. I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t know if there is a specific term for this \u00e2\u20ac\u201c I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m\u00c2\u00a0still<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0learning about my own mental illness and how it manifests! \u00e2\u20ac\u201c but it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s a distortion. O\u00e2\u20ac\u2122Brien\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s perception of reality was distorted by traumatic external forces, and then his mind continues that distortion when he looks upon other people. His whole reality has been molded into a new, unrecognizable shape, and it hurts. Badly.<\/p>\n
Look, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m sure there\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s a lot more to this, and I am by no means an expert on any of this shit. But I appreciate that I can now point to an episode of\u00c2\u00a0Star Trek<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0if I need to describe what an experience is like. I can say that my PTSD sometimes looks\u00c2\u00a0exactly<\/i>\u00c2\u00a0like what happens to O\u00e2\u20ac\u2122Brien in this episode. And if that helps me and other people understand the world a little better, then bless \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Hard Time.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d I certainly felt like the experience was worth it.<\/p>\n
AND THEY DIDN\u00e2\u20ac\u2122T MAGICALLY CURE HIM EITHER. I STILL CAN\u00e2\u20ac\u2122T BELIEVE THIS.<\/p>\n
The video for \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Hard Time\u00e2\u20ac\u009d can be downloaded\u00c2\u00a0here for $0.99<\/a>.<\/p>\n Mark Links Stuff<\/b><\/p>\n – I am now on Patreon<\/a>! There are various levels of support, from $1 up to whatever you want! You’ll get to read a private blog, extra reviews, and other such rewards.<\/b> In the nineteenth episode of the fourth season of\u00c2\u00a0Deep Space Nine, this is one of the most fucked up episodes of\u00c2\u00a0Star Trek\u00c2\u00a0ever. Intrigued? Then it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s time for Mark to watch\u00c2\u00a0Star Trek.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[640,614],"tags":[615],"class_list":["post-5731","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-deep-space-nine","category-star-trek","tag-mark-watches-star-trek"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5731","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5731"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5731\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5731"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5731"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5731"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\n– I\u00c2\u00a0will be at numerous conventions in 2016! Check the full list of events on my Tour Dates \/ Appearances page.<\/a>
\n– My Master Schedule<\/a> is updated for the near and distant future for most projects, so please check it often.\u00c2\u00a0My next Double Features for Mark Watches have been announced here.<\/a>
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