{"id":2813,"date":"2013-09-13T08:00:27","date_gmt":"2013-09-13T15:00:27","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/?p=2813"},"modified":"2013-11-22T16:25:00","modified_gmt":"2013-11-23T00:25:00","slug":"mark-watches-fullmetal-alchemist-brotherhood-episode-31","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/2013\/09\/mark-watches-fullmetal-alchemist-brotherhood-episode-31\/","title":{"rendered":"Mark Watches &#8216;Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood&#8217;: Episode 31"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>In the thirty-first episode of <i>Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood<\/i>, this show is unfair. Intrigued? Then it&#8217;s time for Mark to watch <i>FMA:B<\/i>.<\/p>\n<p><!--more-->This fucking show, I swear.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Y&#8217;all, the camera shifted to show the missing chimera, and I even commented on the fact that I didn&#8217;t know there were chimeras in the room, and <i>I still didn&#8217;t fucking get it<\/i>.<\/li>\n<li>Can Mark Does Stuff just be a continual experiment in documenting one man&#8217;s inability to understand anything? Because that&#8217;s what this is turning into.<\/li>\n<li>I know I brought this up in the previous review, but I&#8217;m so thankful that Edward has a friend in Riza. I just adore her so much, I swear.<\/li>\n<li>Plus, this whole exchange is followed by Edward meeting up with Al and FEELING HOPE FOR THE FUTURE. That&#8217;s dangerous. I know it. I know it, and <i>I don&#8217;t care<\/i>. I actually think it&#8217;s a neat (and probably unintentional) parallel to what Dr. Knox expresses later in &#8220;The 520 Cens Promise.&#8221; For the moment, these characters want to experience happiness, joy, or hope, even if they know it can&#8217;t last long.<\/li>\n<li>What have I become when I now believe it is impossible for these characters to be happy for more than five minutes? <i>Bitter and broken<\/i>, that&#8217;s what. ALL YOUR FAULT.<\/li>\n<li>Okay, I get a kick out of multiple characters thinking Xiao-Mei is a cat. He is not! He is an adorable pygmy panda! AND I WOULD ADORE HIM AS A FRIEND.<\/li>\n<li>Y&#8217;all, it&#8217;s just so <i>lonely<\/i> to watch all of Mustang&#8217;s comrades get sent all over the world. Even if Riza is still in Central Command, they no longer work together. It is important to note, though, that she has a remarkably optimistic outlook on the whole thing. She&#8217;s concerned about her best friend, and we&#8217;ve already seen how she&#8217;ll do whatever she can to protect him, not just from outside factors, but from <i>himself<\/i>.<\/li>\n<li>Which is also a theme that pops up when Edward reminds Mustang that he&#8217;s going to hold him accountable during his quest to the top of the military. Mustang&#8217;s friends are also trying to protect him from himself.<\/li>\n<li>I just have waterfalls of feelings about Riza Hawkeye. <i>I hope that this is okay<\/i>.<\/li>\n<li>I also forgot about Jean Havoc. Sorry!!! He hasn&#8217;t been around for over ten episodes, right???<\/li>\n<li>This episode uses a chess metaphor to tell a story. Now <i>The West Wing<\/i> and <i>Fullmetal Alchemist<\/i> have both done this, and <i>I LOVE IT<\/i>.<\/li>\n<li>ALSO THERE IS A MESSAGE IN THE KING.<\/li>\n<li>WHO IS MADAME CHRISTMAS?<\/li>\n<li>WHAT DOES GRUMMAN HAVE TO DO WITH THIS?<\/li>\n<li><i>WHY ARE YOU ADDING ANOTHER MYSTERY TO THIS SHOW WHEN THERE ARE ALREADY A THOUSAND OF THEM?<\/i><\/li>\n<li>Because that&#8217;s what&#8217;s so great about the narrative force of <i>Fullmetal Alchemist<\/i>. I spoke briefly about this at the end of the commission for &#8220;The 520 Cens Promise,&#8221; but I&#8217;ll elaborate here. I am <i>floored<\/i> that this show has managed to answer so many of my questions along the way without dragging out the plot longer than it needs to be. It&#8217;s <i>not<\/i> like <i>LOST<\/i>, which dangled the carrot in front of its viewers for <i>years<\/i> before they were finally given the bait. Instead, as one door closes, another opens, and the writers take this story in fascinating new directions. We&#8217;ve got a new thread to follow, for example, when Fu returns to Amestris when Lan Fan and Ling don&#8217;t return. I think I just plain forgot that he was Lan Fan&#8217;s grandfather??? Anyway, it&#8217;s a rough scene to watch because Fu is so hostile towards his granddaughter, but we&#8217;re given a glimpse of the future. Somehow, they&#8217;ve got to get Ling home before the Xing Emperor dies. HOW IS THIS SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN???<\/li>\n<li>Just remember that I also said that Dr. Knox was secretly a &#8220;softie&#8221; and then less than five minutes later, his estranged wife and son arrive and he&#8217;s crying to himself in his kitchen, and this fucking show keeps finding ways to ruin me and IT ISN&#8217;T FAIR.<\/li>\n<li>oh. <i>Oh<\/i>. So that&#8217;s why Kimblee is in jail. Remember that I <i>also<\/i> asked why he was there and then the show answered me.<\/li>\n<li>THAT WATCH GAG IS NOT OKAY. <i>THAT WATCH GAG IS NOT OKAY<\/i>.<\/li>\n<li>As I just mentioned, this show finds new ways to move the story along that keeps it serialized, keeps it fresh, and constantly surprises me. (Though I must assume that most of, if not all of, this comes from Hiromu Arakawa, who wrote and illustrated the manga.) Because there&#8217;s now a new thread to follow: The Homunculi have freed Kimblee to kill Scar (if he wants to), return Dr. Marcoh to them, and then EXTERMINATE AN UNNAMED CITY BECAUSE <i>WHY WHY WHY<\/i>. Literally, their gift to Kimblee is to let him destroy any town he chooses. <i>The whole thing<\/i>.<\/li>\n<li>Okay, so you know when Envy holds up the Philosopher&#8217;s Stone and says it was made from the lives of Marcoh&#8217;s assistants? Does he mean the prisoners there or <i>his actual research assistants<\/i>?<\/li>\n<li>There is another plot thread! Scar is taking Yoki, May, Xiao Mei, and Dr. Marcoh north to retrieve Scar&#8217;s brother&#8217;s old research notes, where he hid them, so that Dr. Marcoh can translate them. That is very exciting! I want to know what they say!<\/li>\n<li>OH, THEN SCAR LITERALLY CHANGES THE PHYSICAL APPEARANCE OF DR. MARCOH&#8217;S FACE<\/li>\n<li>This show is deeply unfair on a <i>cosmic level<\/i>.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/markdoesstuff.com\/products\/mark-watches-fullmetal-alchemist-brotherhood\" target=\"_blank\">The video commission for this episode is now archived in my store for just $0.99! You can purchase the entire show at once for only $49.99 for 64 videos!<\/a><\/p>\n<p><strong>NOTE: The next\u00c2\u00a0<em>Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood<\/em> review will go up on September 23rd. I will be out of town from September 10 &#8211; 16, and cannot write Double Feature reviews that week, so we&#8217;ll take a break on these for just one week. Thank you! Please check the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.google.com\/calendar\/embed?src=815s3sbr8clhdi9tn8k7r3tim4%40group.calendar.google.com&amp;ctz=America\/Los_Angeles\" target=\"_blank\">Master Schedule<\/a> for all info regarding scheduling.\u00c2\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><b>Mark Links Stuff<\/b><\/p>\n<p>&#8211; I have redesigned <a href=\"http:\/\/markdoesstuff.com\/\">MarkDoesStuff.com<\/a>! <a href=\"http:\/\/markdoesstuff.com\/blogs\/news\/8154711-welcome-to-the-new-mark-does-stuff-store\">Check out this post explaining the new changes<\/a>, which includes the start of <a href=\"http:\/\/markdoesstuff.com\/collections\/all\/video-commissions\">a permanent archive of all Mark Watches videos<\/a>!<br \/>\n&#8211; <a href=\"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/2013\/06\/mark-does-stuff-summer-tour-2013-is-here\/\">The Mark Does Stuff Summer Tour is happening now! Check out the posted dates, suggest new ones, help bring me to YOUR TOWN<\/a>.<br \/>\n-\u00c2\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/markreads.net\/reviews\/2013\/02\/mark-reads-harry-potter-the-deathly-hallows-is-now-available\/\"><b><i>Mark Reads Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows<\/i><\/b><b>\u00c2\u00a0is now published and available for purchase!<\/b><\/a><b>\u00c2\u00a0It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s available in ebook AND physical book format, and you can also get a discount for buying the ENTIRE SET of digital books: $25 for 7 BOOKS!!!<\/b><b><br \/>\n<\/b><b>-\u00c2\u00a0<\/b>Video commissions are open, and <a href=\"http:\/\/markdoesstuff.com\/products\/mark-reads-mark-watches-video-commission\">you can commission a Mark Reads\/Watches video for just $25!<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>In the thirty-first episode of Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood, this show is unfair. Intrigued? Then it&#8217;s time for Mark to watch FMA:B.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[554],"tags":[555],"class_list":["post-2813","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-fullmetal-alchemist-brotherhood","tag-mark-watches-fmab"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2813","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2813"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2813\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2813"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2813"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/markwatches.net\/reviews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2813"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}<!-- WP Super Cache is installed but broken. 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